11 Comments
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David Perlmutter's avatar

So: is he saying marmalade is a cure for erectile dysfunction?

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Harry's avatar

Important: The one with less sugar

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Frank T Bird's avatar

Indeed Davy. Do you need? lol

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Grand Mal Twerkin's avatar

Wow! I just found out you’re Australian, unless that part is fictional. I assume the rest is a true story

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Ginger Cook (GC)'s avatar

Top Ass 😅

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Jack Everly's avatar

Delightful. Reminded me of Chuck before the "Fight Club" rules. I actually read this because I thought it would be about weird cafés, and I just read a gloriously ridiculous article about one in London. But yes, it's a great name for a café.

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Harry's avatar

Fart Camp 🏕️ Damn, he could even suck Rita’s horse tits and get a discount. That’s just how things work in Australia. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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George P Farrell's avatar

Just took the A train through an orderly insane asylum.

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Arthur Rosch's avatar

to quote from The Gods Of The Gift:

When they had rested, the pilgrims descended

into the restaurant cabaret. It was, to the relief of all, a room of bland

simplicity. A sprinkling of people sat and conversed out of both ends,

drinking aperitifs at round tables. On a small stage there were bellows-

like contrivances and open frameworks set over pivoting chairs.

Appearing in a cloud of his own waft, Dzupa bowed to Garuvel's

table and let a short, simple fart.

"What you just heard was the emission of a novice student at the

University of Gastric Winds. My trade-fart, however, famous all over

Shoms is....." and he proceeded to cut his booming clarion call.

Klomos, with a pinched look, responded in kind.

"Ah! Very good." Dzupa nodded vigorously. "Although I don't personally subscribe to such angst." He pulled up a stool and sat, with his elbows on the table. "I'm considered something of a virtuoso, you know. Two of the one hundred fourteen main types of flatulence are named for my ancestors. It is an alphabet, you see, that every child

of Ha’nar learns from the time he or she can control the rectal muscles

and the bowel winds. As Bonazumpto, one of the great pioneers of the

art of farting said, 'it is infintely more pleasurable and beneficial to health

to fart outwardly with relish than inwardly with pain.'"

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Arthur Rosch's avatar

Ya nailed this one, FT. It's one of your more exemplary expositions of arcane concepts related to the sciences and arts of flatulence. Read in my fantasy novel, "The Gods Of The Gift" how an entire culture lent itself to various disciplines of flatulence so that the art of farting became the sine qua non of an entire society. Their norms of entertainment and every day communication tended to break down into howls of laughter. Why are farts so fuckin' funny?

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Jul 11, 2024
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Frank T Bird's avatar

Thanks, Champ. I appreciate your kind words 🙏💚

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